Category Archives: self esteem

List of things to be happy about

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So we know we should be grateful every day; right?  Yes, we should!   But some days are harder than others!   So here is my list is goto things to be happy about when things are…less than stellar!

  1. My Cat; Mr. Whiskers
  2. Comfy Shoes
  3. A soft bed
  4. Fuzzy Socks
  5. Cozy BunnyHugs (Saskatchewan word for hoodie)
  6. Chocolate ( always keep a secret stash Mum tip!)
  7. The way the rain sounds when it hits the roof
  8. OR the fact the Sun is in the sky. It’s always a good day when the suns out. It rains A LOT where we live!
  9. Cookies!!!!!  Mmmm cookies
  10. A warm dry house…see #8
  11. Music!  Listen to your favourite song
  12. DANCING
  13. A good movie…I’m sensing another post about movies and Netflix!
  14. Comfortable pants; as I get older comfy pants a huge happy dance moment.
  15. Nice smelling Soap
  16. A nice pen! I love writing with a really nice pen!
  17. Fancy paper; I’m a stationary geek!
  18. Cooking a big meal for my family
  19. An organised pantry ( yup it makes me happy)
  20. Having a nice smelling house; walking in the door and having the aroma of my own house hit me.  It makes me happy!
  21. A clean and tidy kitchen bench! (I’m not a neat freak but I do love coming into my kitchen and it’s tidy)
  22. If my girls cook; which by the way leaves a HUGE mess in the kitchen BUT still makes me happy!
  23. Cooking/baking with my girls.
  24. Cooking with my Husband
  25. Cooking for a Group!
  26. BBQing. I love cooking and love it, even more, when I cook outdoors!
  27. My smartphone; yes this sounds vain but it’s my connection to all things back home.
  28. A hot bath, with candles and music
  29. Slippers!

As I read through that list I saw a trend. I think I like to cook. This is just a quick list of things I can be things I can be grateful for!  On very difficult days I like to look at things that do challenge me and turn them into something to grateful for. Each day is a challenge; it’s up to you if that’s a good thing or a bad thing.

What’s on your Gratitude list? Drop me a comment I’d love to hear from you.

Later Peeps

Why is it so hard to get dressed?

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As women how much time do we spend deciding what to wear?   I used to spend hours agonizing about what to wear!  I would try on different outfits with different shoes, only to walk around for about 30 seconds to realize they hurt my feet.  The pants ride up, and the shirt just feels all wrong.  BUT we wear anyway as this is what we THINK society wants us to look like

  • wearing uncomfortable clothes
  • Bill Gates/ successful men dressing in “uniforms”
  •  we try to fit in.
  •  Into a mold that we, in fact, create ourselves
    we dress to suit what we think the solution demands

When we got to NZ I felt like I stood out like a sore thumb.  I could feel people looking at me and knowing that I wasn’t from here.  I struggled to fit into what I felt was NZ styles.  When I went to social outings I had NO idea how to dress so I dressed in my best Canadian outfit. But still, I felt like a stood out.  I went to my first meeting here I was so stressed out over what to wear I almost didn’t go, but my need for human interaction far outweighed by anxiety.  I was, of course, way overdressed and I think I could have worn a paper bag cause I asked some pretty crazy questions that no one has any idea what I wore but they alllllll remember what I said!!!!   But that’s a story for another day!

So how do we need to dress?  Well, let’s start with what’s comfortable!  I’m not saying that you should turn up to a meeting in your track pants and bunnyhug (the Saskatchewan word for a hoodie). But what I am saying is make sure you’re comfortable. Can you move properly?  Can sit down without having to THINK. Can you lift your arm above your shoulders, without A. exposing parts of your body and B. Almost ripping your blazer like the Hulk!   You never know when you need to quickly raise your arm to catch something.  I know this sounds ridiculous BUT truthfully you need to be able to move!   As women and mothers, we need to be able to move unrestricted, freely and comfortably. Does this mean walking around in our PJs?  NO, NO it does NOT. It just means dress sensibly and smart.

Our lives as mothers are so complex, we go from role to role to role…most of the time in the same set of clothes unless your superman and can change in a phone booth…I have changed my clothes in the car. Yup, sometimes we do what we need to do! So keep this in mind when purchasing and or revamping your wardrobe.

  • Comfortable
  • Flexibility
  • Function
  • Ability to match items with each other

All in all, make things simple for your self and this will make your life simple! When we don’t have to think about what we wear that will save us SO much time and maybe just maybe we won’t be late!!!  BAHAHAHAHA Who am I kidding, something else is going to come up and make us late.  Some sort of meltdown ( may or may not be a CHILDS meltdown) lost car keys….that MAY or MAY NOT BE IN MY HAND(don’t ask).

Take care peeps!

20 things to start right now!

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In My Journey to a better to be more myself this is my list of things I want to add to my life daily!

  1. Drink a lot of water and green/white tea; the best tea I have ever had is from my wonderful friend Sarah, and her Tea House- A Himalayan Experience; get your AMAZING TEA HERE!
  2. Eat small meals during the day
  3. Eat more Fruit, veggies
  4. Go for a walk, bike, swim, jog
  5. Where comfortable shoes
  6. Go to bed earlier
  7. Stop thinking Negetive thoughts about your self and others
  8. Don’t dwell on the past, just let it go
  9. Enjoy the little things in life…like crisp clean sheets!
  10. Don’t compare your self to others; you only see what’s on the outside you have no idea what thier life is really like
  11. Practice Meditation
  12. Eat healthy; BUT for pity sake EAT THE CAKE
  13. Stretch daily to increase flexiblity
  14. Avoid putting things off…I am sooo bad at this
  15. Listen to peaceful music
  16. DANCE
  17. SING LOUDLY
  18. Wear cloths that make you HAPPY!
  19. Throw away things that you don’t need
  20. Remember that you are enough
  21. Go OUTSIDE MORE!

If I set goals of doing this list daily I think I will be in a pretty epic place next year.  If you find yourself on a similar journey don’t forget the most important goal is to be kind to yourself every day.  This is a list of things that will really help me become more aligned with who I want to be. It will put me on a path the will make me be more ME…self care, self love and by doing this all the rest of life will fall into place.  You know the saying if Momma aint happy aint nobody happy.  Well what are you waiting for, let’s make Momma happy!

 

Thanks for reading peeps!  Take care, be well, Be Happy, Be Kind, and Be YOU!

 

Crystal

Proud as a Peacock!

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RENO UPDATE!!!

  • Painters have come and gone…not TOTALLY loving the color yet…but I think once the shower curtain is up and the accessories are in place it will be ok!
  • Tiles are in and I LOVE them!
  • Bath Liner AKA Tub Surround has to be redone it didn’t adhere properly to the wall.
  • Plumber is on standby ready to come at a moments notice once Bath liner is replaced

In short there is a brighter light at the end of the Bathroom reno tunnel!

So this week there was assembly day at the girls school, and I normally attend them  however not as regularly as I did when they first started school but I try to make it to them.  I love going to them I will never forget the first one attended, it was a just within the first weeks of us arriving here.  The kids all filed into the Hall at the school, sat on the floor and waited for the beginning of the assembly.  I wasn’t sure what to expect, and I certainly didn’t think I would have the reaction that I did. Then came the Karakia which a Maori prayer that is said before a meeting or gathering , at the beginning of the day and or at the end of the day.  The kids all stood up and said this wonderful prayer in maori it was very touching to see and hear. Next they all sang the same Karakia which was followed by the national anthem, I was very glad I was in the back alone because as I stood there I become so over come with emotion that this was the school that we had chosen for our children, I was so proud that they will part of this wonderful school community and family! I cried, tears streamed down my face and I almost broke into the ugly cry you ALL know what the ugly cry is it’s the one where your face distorts into most AWFUL shape possible and you sob!  Ya I am an emotional sap at the best of times when it comes to things like this but there was something that just so soul filling that was coming from this school that it just got me! SO back to THIS weeks assembly! BOTH girls were given awards, Big E was chosen as a student of the week AND got her second golden reach!  Little T got her 1st and 2nd golden reaches in ONE week Well done girlie AND she was also Super Snooped by the REACH squad ( I will explain REACH in a second).  Her name wasn’t chosen as the winner but it was so nice to hear my girls names mentioned so many times in the assembly they really are doing well and becoming part of the school!  I love it! I didn’t have many reservations about moving over here BUT the one thing that I was really nervous about was how well would the girls do I could NOT be more proud of how well they have handled all the changes that we have thrown their way. They are doing really really well.  Have they had a few melt downs YES yes they have!  Have I had  few melt downs as well…YES yes I sure have!  BUT I have also noticed that they really really depend on ME and feed off of my energy when I am down they are down if I am having a great day they will 99% of the time be alright as well.  So it really is true if you put out positive you get back positive!

SO REACH is a program that the girls school uses to promote positive behaviour and interpersonal relationships.  Respect for ourselves others & authority learning & achievement property and the environment,  Expect the best that you can be the best that others can be Achieve through opportunity achieve as much as possible become involved and contribute Communicate effectively and appropriately Hauora Feel good about yourself Be safe physically and emotionally.  This is focused on in ever aspect of the school and it is truly a great program.  The super snoopers watch all the kids and give them points ( I think) and also bring their names to assembly to let it be known that they have done a  good job this week with their REACH goals.  It makes these students become very independent and aware,  not only themselves but their peers as well.  This shows not only at the school but once they leave the school.  I had a conversation the other day with one of the moms at the school and we were discussing what High School her kids are going to, and to be honest we had given New Plymouth all girls high school serious thought, no boys to distract the girls this could be a good thing.  BUT the more we are here the more we are experiencing the community and the soul of these schools the more I know I want the girls to continue onto the local high school.  This lady was telling me that the teachers at the High School here will know what kids come from this Primary school as they are very independent and hard-working students!  That is great to hear!

So this was a great week for us!  The girls are just doing so well I couldn’t be happier!  The curve balls we have thrown at them, and they have just caught them smiled and threw that ball back and said lets play!   I think we are raising some well-adjusted little women! PHEW Insert GIANT sigh of relief!  Mind you we haven’t hit the teens this blog will change a GREAT deal then I am sure of it…I will also need a LOT more wine I Daddy better get his game face sorted before those boys come knocking at the door!!

Well I have blabbered on for long enough I have more blogs that I am working on as well!   So blog more soon and as  always thanks for reading!!

Tea, heat and warmth

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This was a short and lovely week!  After a great long weekend with the fam jam this was a really short and great week. We have had builders and trades people in and out of the house all week, all of whom are working hard to get us a proper “Canadian” Bathroom; one with bath that doesn’t gross us out and a TOILET! We are also working on getting heating into the house…a small let down as it was supposed to be finished and installed and ON today BUT with this house NOTHING goes easy.  So we do not have heat it will be on FOR SURE Tuesday so says the Gas Fitter….which is 4 more days of no heating….SO off the Chicken/Wood shed again tomorrow for more wood.  BUT on a bright and very kind note while I was out for the day and once the gas fitter realised that he wouldn’t have the heat going he kept the fire going on low to make sure it was going to be warm when we got home from netball!  Very nice man…OR he was just afraid what would happen to him if I came home to a cold house AND the furnace NOT going! He’s no dummy!

The weather today was AMAZING the sun was out and shining brightly, the sky was blue and the Mt Taranaki

View of Mount Taranaki from Stratford, facing ...

View of Mount Taranaki from Stratford, facing west. Fanthams Peak is to the left of the main peak. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

was out in full! One of the ladies today from the tea put it perfectly any day you can see the mountain is going to be a good day!! And today was no exception!  We were so lucky with the weather today, it has been either rainy or really windy OR Rainy and WINDY all of which it was quite chilly!  BUT today there was no wind the sun was blazing in the sky and Mt Taranaki was out to say Hello! This morning was a welcoming Tea put on by Hubbies work it was for the wives of new employees who have just arrived in New Plymouth.  We all met at the lady’s house who is in charge of the relocation program.  She will help us with basically what ever we need finding school, houses, food, Diapers, cars, insurance the list goes on! I honestly haven’t reached out to use her; but the other ladies have.  There we 6 of us new ladies there today.  We all have been here for varying amounts of time, December, ME in Jan, March, April, and 2 in May. 2 Kiwi’s 1 lady from Singapore 2 from Pakistan and me the Canadian, there was one lady who couldn’t make as her kids were not feeling well and she is from the UK. It was really great to meet them all and share our stories of things we have experienced so far.  It’s weird being the one with the “experience” as one lady and I were here the longest.  Some have bought houses, others are just renting, some are still in the hotel that was provided by the company.  We sat there and laughed with each other, laugh at some of our silly stories of fitting in, shared stories of how desperate you become for adult company that the old lady or man sitting on the park bench looks more than appealing enough to sit down and chat to for HOURS at a time.  OR You would actually accept and invitation from a complete stranger for tea with an 84 year old lady NOT THAT WASN’T me skockingly enough!  YUP you get that lonely! BUT we had a morning of soul rejuvenation and it felt GREAT! We exchanged numbers and we will all get together soon.  I think we will try to do a group get together once a month, it will be great for us all!

Today the girls had their netball games and they both did soooo well! I am so proud of them for playing netball and giving it their all! They have done so well with all the changes that we have thrown at them. They didn’t choose to leave home, they didn’t choose to leave their friends that was our decision that we made for them.  BUT they have been doing extremely well, they have made friends are flourishing in the world we have created for them.  But I still see the effects of the move more so in Little T, the other day was my day to volunteer at the school and E said I had to work today. Poor Little T was devastated because I didn’t tell her I was going back to work let alone that I already had a job and was going back to work. She calmed down when I told her I was only going to volunteer at the school like I did every Wednesday since they have started school.  At first she looked relieved but then she looked worried again I said what’s wrong; her reply was…Mommy I don’t want you to go back to work BUT if you do I want you get a job that you are home after school, and you have weekends off AND  you can’t work any of the school holidays! I smiled at her and gave her a big hug and said ME TOO!  She thought about this for a second and Well I guess that isn’t gonna happen is it?!?! I said WHEN and IF I decide to go back to work I will try to find a job just like that!  Bless her heart! It’s moments like that one that makes this opportunity to stay home and be a Momma so worth while!  I have been kicking around the idea of work BUT It would have to be VERY flexible and I would like to do it from my home…so we will see what I can find.  There are some more important things that need tending to WAY before work comes along!

Well that is it for me!  I have had a long week.  Time to put my feet up and read a book, The Library here has a HUGE selection of Ebooks…I LOVE IT!!! So far in the last week and a half I have read 3 books! LOVE IT! Grocery shopping on-line Free E Books, Mt Taranaki in my back yard, winters that don’t get below 0 and if it does it isn’t very often What’s NOT TO LOVE ABOUT IT HERE?…well my Fam Jam isn’t here BUT OTHER THAN that It is amazing!  New Zealand has stolen my heart I am here and I am LOVING IT, every second and every adventure; it’s truly wonderful!

Well  blog again soon! Thanks for reading another adventure!

Aside

Hello everyone, I hope that you have had a great Mothers day I have been trying to think of what to blog about so lets start with something I have borrowed from one of the women in my life that have influenced me  she is a strong and loving Mother and friend and she couldn’t have said this any better. “Happy Mothers Day to all who are mothers to their children, to their husbands, to their friends, to the children on the street, to the animals in their lives.  I guess what I am saying is you don’t have to have had children to be a mother – but you have the god given instinct to care and love.”  I have to say that she hit the nail on the head “the god given instinct to care and love”  It is days like Mothers Day where I like to reflect on what I am, who I am , and WHY I am.  I strive my best to do the best I can for my Children always; have I made a mess of some time YES, have I had to look at my crushed child cause I yelled at her for no reason other than I have had a bad day and she asked me the same thing 40 TIMES AND I SNAPPED. The look on my girls faces when I get cross with them for no reason crushes my  “mom” soul…which makes me HAPPY cause I HAVE MOM SOUL! It makes me be able recognize that what I have just done has HURT my childs feelings, and I will go and apologize to her and tell her that Mommy is having a bad day and that she didn’t REALLY do anything that bad…other than annoy me; so quit it…we have a good laugh and get on with it!  I think it is so important to admit to our kids that you are wrong and that we make mistakes just like they do, and when we do I will apologize OR make sure that Daddy does the same thing.  Some people in this world don’t have that instinct at all, which is so very very sad to me; because they miss out on so many blessing that come from being a parent; a true parent. Just because you gave birth doesn’t make you a mother.  It is that MOM instinct either you have or you don’t! I thanked my girls yesterday for allowing me to be able to celebrate Mothers Day and My Hubby for making me a Momma cause lets face it with out children or my Husband I would just be ME…Well I am still me just not the MOM me! LOL That got confusing but I hope I got the point across!

I have been so lucky to have many Mommy’s, so many amazing women to influence me and mold me into what I am today.  From childhood up until the time I left Canada I was still learning amazing things; from amazing women ALL of them blessed with the Mom instinct.  I am sure that I will continue to learn from them and from more women that I meet as I continue down the life path we are on!

As for my fabulous day here in New Zealand the girls and I headed into New Plymouth, to get Daddy some insulation as he is still working under the house poor man LOVE HIM.  We picked up the insulation, then Miss T reminded me she didn’t have any sandals SO we head to the shoe store… by some shopping Miracle I managed to buy her ONE pair of sandals and NOTHING ELSE I know feel free to gasp!  3 girls in a shoe store and we came out with ONE pair of shoes, I know I was proud of myself!  Anyway, after that we made our way to the coastal walkway.  The girls scootered along the Ocean, played at the park then we went to the Big Wave Cafe for an Ice Cream and a Mochachino.   The girls went down the water, where they played in the sand, managed to find me some amazing pieces of sea glass.  They had a great time and I had an amazing Mothers Day with my sweet girls! How lucky am I?!?!  Before we left Big E wrote me a message in the sand HAPPY MOTHERS DAY!  What a sweet sweet girl!

Mt Taranaki

Mt Taranaki

Little T's New Flash Shoes!

Little T’s New Flash Shoes!

Going down the coastal walkway

Going down the coastal walkway

Cool Flowers

Cool Flowers

Big E Writting Happy Mothers Day in the Sand for me!

Big E Writting Happy Mothers Day in the Sand for me!

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Blog more soon!

Mothers Day

Beauty and Buckets!

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So today I was under the weather my lovely daughter Miss T was sick yesterday and because she is such a good girl she shared with her Mommy what a sweet heart hey! So while I was ill, I had a chance to chill on the couch, catch up on some emails surf facebook…feed my addictions to Candy Crush and Pintrest! Pretty chilled out day…besides the ickyness that tagged along with it! BUT in my travels of the world-wide web I stumbled upon this http://realbeautysketches.dove.com/ , which was all over Facebook and pintrest, and it really spoke to me!  It brought tears to my eyes to see what women actually think of themselves. I know this when I look in the mirror I have often wondered what do other people see! Is the first thing they notice my bushy eyebrows…..WHICH HAVE COME BACK TO STYLE WooHOO; It hurts too much to pluck or tweeze NO THANKS!  BUT after my brief moment I immediately thought of my two beautiful girls and they will also suffer this same fate!  We have to be kinder to each other GIRLS are the worst!  They are the meanest creatures on the planet!  We are fierce friends, BUT even fiercer enemies that one poor girl who finds her self not in that “Inner circle” is just bullied and badgered, I know I was there when I was growing up the one on the outside looking in at the “pretty girls” at one point; it’s amazing how much words can do to a young persons self-esteem. I don’t want that for my girls which is why even BEFORE this video appeared I vowed that I would fill-up their “buckets” with self-esteem at home as much as I could that way the world will have a much harder time to empty it for them; if you haven’t heard of the “bucket” check this out http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lNoVVboebvY. So I wanted each girl to have a powerful quote written on their wall of their room so when they woke up that is what they would see and read each day.  But then I couldn’t decide WHICH quote to use so I have a different idea!! Each girl will have an empty picture frame on the wall of the their room and we/I will write a quote/saying inspirational word or words on it to make them look inside them selves and really see what is important and that they are beautiful!  This way they will touch on all things that are important and I can use quotes words of wisdom to fit what is going on in our lives! I will post pics of these once I find the frames…OPP SHOPPING woo hoo.

We need to be there for these little girls growing up in such a airbrushed world and make them see that the women that they see everyday THOSE are the real women not the airbrushed faces on the magazines or on the internet.  My girls are young 7 and 9 but I want them to realise these things NOW before they have the “ideal” picture in there head!  The other day I was getting ready and applying make-up, which quite honestly I don’t do often and Big E was watching me and she said Mommy why do you put all that stuff on your face you’re beautiful just the way you are! Well if that doesn’t bring a tear to mommy’s eye nothing will!  The next time I applied makeup I looked at myself before then again after….and I washed my face! I used to wear makeup So I didn’t look so pale but now with a tan it’s ok!  I slap on a bit of Mascara so I can have some eyelashes and away we go! So if my Big E can say one thing to me to make me see what she sees, then I really need to make sure she knows that she is beautiful as well, inside and out!

It is my job as a mother to these to amazing little girls to make sure they are strong enough with who they are to not let ANYONE try to change them! They are beautiful smart STUBBORN little girls and I love them so much to let anyone try to make them different! YES in this case STUBBORN is a good trait; just not when they are arguing over brushing their teeth!

Well that is all for now so go on fill a bucket and have a great day!